Two Hopeless Prospects; One Impossible Goal

The Project

Zadie Creek Stables has acquired two new horses this year that are, for lack of a better way of putting it, slow plugs that could be out-run by most yearlings.  They are the worst racehorses to ever stumble onto the track and yet the stable’s manager Issalyn insists they can do as well as any allowance horse when it comes to earning points and money.  She claims that in one year of racing they will have earned 50 points and $500k in purse money each.  The two horses in question, Average Joe and Project Runway, will begin racing this meet.

The Horses

Average Joe is a 3yo custom colt trained to race well on both surfaces.  He’s a plain bay horse, not much to look at on or off the track.  The versatility won’t help him much however as he only seems to have one speed: snail.  Early in the race, middle of the race, late in the race…this colt has no speed to give.  There’s nothing special about the distance he can run either; this colt is a typical miler.  He’s also proven rather fussy and flighty on the track, not listening to his jockey and shying at the slightest hint of trouble.  The heart of a champion does not reside in this sad colt.

Project Runway is a 4yo non-custom filly trained to race on both surfaces equally well.  Sadly she is no better than Average Joe, fussing about on the track and running at the same pathetic speed the entire time.  She falls asleep in the starting gate and takes half the race to get up to her top speed-which again is far too slow.  This filly will limp across the finish line about 20 or more lengths behind the rest of the field.  Another miler, there is nothing to set this filly apart from the others aside from how fantastically bad she is.

The Verdict

It will take a miracle for those horses to get even halfway towards the goal set by Issalyn.  About the only way they stand a chance is to enter the emptiest of races for mooch wins because against real racehorses, even claims level horses, they can’t win.  They won’t even place in the money.  I don’t know why Issalyn is torturing herself, the staff at Zadie Creek Stables, and those poor horses in this manner.  Hopefully those two aren’t scarred for life at the end of year and can be turned into good OTTB pleasure/trail horses.